Flirtatious: My what a gorgeous mechanical appendage you have there. I'll bet you pump titanium, don't you? Now don't you try and deny it.
Real Mood: non compos mentis
Prediction? This day will never make any sense. (But while I'm on the subject of predictions, a few days ago I predicted it will be the musicians, whose names we don't know, who'll bring New Orleans back to life? Well today's answer to a syndicated coded puzzle called the Celebrity Cipher, came from trumpeter Kermit Ruffins. 'Sorry Kermit...never heard of you.' He is quoted by lthe puzzle people as saying, "I can't wait to get there and throw the grand reopening party on the NEW New Orleans." Am I just lucky, or what? And did this just break the Guiness Record for most words in a single set of parentheses?)
Now to my new feature on CNN weather maven Jacqui Jeras' fashion choices of the day.
I should have known right away when I woke myself up early to catch Jacqui's act? This will not be a normal day. It feels like those horrible days in the newsroom when you had set up this great story. You'd been working on it for a week. It was going to be visual, and full of interesting people or animals.
But right away, as you walk by the assignment desk, the smile gets wiped off your face.
"Hey, Paul. Billy Bob called in sick and you're going to have to cover the legislature."
Well here I am all bleary eyed and propped up in bed with my reporter's notebook, and pencil in hand. I want to remember every detail of Jacqui's outfit.
Out of the mouth of anchor Soledad O'brien comes, " but first we're going to get a look at the weather from Bonnie Schneider."
"WHAT? WHO? WHY?" ( where and when are not critical in this case.)
They'd pulled a switch on me. Even more bizarre is this Schneider babe could be a clone of the Jeras person. She has the same hair, the same voice inflections, and an almost identical physical configuration. I guess she has a little more meat on her cheek bones, and her lips are a bit fuller than Jacqui's. But that's about it. So I'll be a pro. I'll just evaluate HER outfit. But guesss what? Ol' Bonnie and Jacqui must be pretty close. Why? Cause Bonnie is wearing Jacqui's outfit from November 4th. There is no way to advance the story.
But let's pause here to talk about CNN cloning. Can you show me any visual or vocal differences between Daren Kagen and Carol Costello? We had the "Boys from Brazil," and now we get the "Girls from CNN." I also noticed that every single female anchor or specialist on in the morning has the same hair cut. All their hairs are the same length...and kind of sloppily layered about shoulder length. Weird. And what's up with dueling Obriens as co-anchors?
You know I could say, "well THAT'S the story, not Jacqui's outfit."
It would fit my sermon to students titled, "If you can tell a story, there will always be a story. "
Of course the addendum to that is, "even if you don't like it."
The experience left me a little cranky when I arrived on campus. The cranky barometer went up when I got to my Announcing class and less than half it's population showed up. At least once a semester this happens for no really good reason.
But those of us responsible enough to be there, made the most of our time. There's another news room metaphor that applies here, and I'll just say it ends, "chicken soup."
Anyway we really bore down and worked on our voices, problem solving, and body language in that order.
Okay, we sang rap songs and show tunes, had some wild rounds of hangman, and topped it off with charades. I tried to act out " I got plenty of nuttin, " from "Oklahoma." That's also what I got in reponse to my effort...."nuttin."
I'm going to fast forward to tonight. You know it gets darker, faster this time of year. And I've been home alone all week. It's not that I'm afraid of the DARK, but sometimes I do hear things? And sometimes I think I see shadows move from room to room? Not very often. Just once in a while. Don't look for anything exciting here. I'm just setting the tone.
Well some time ago I rambled on in a blog entry about what I call, "Chicken Little News." The essence of my posture is that we ought not hyperbolize teases about upcoming stories. If the stories don't rise to the level of the teases ( if the sky isn't really falling), we can hear the collective groans in viewer's family rooms. (Hang in there. There may be some compos mentis in the end.)
Well in that same " Chicken Littkle" entry, I safely predicted Disney was going to release a "Chicken Liittle" movie. (They had already announced it was coming.) Well I can be a conscientious sort. I felt I should go see the movie before it was reduced to DVD. Hey there might be something in that applies to my sermon. Well I found a theatre and time that worked for me. And of course the time was after dark.
My expectations were that It might be tough on a Friday night. I'm headed for a very popular entertainment area at 9 p.m. I've been hearing that Disney has really put it's reputation and it's pocket book on the line with this movie. I'm expecting a packed house. Enroute I'm even wondering if I'll find a parking place. And it's dark out.
Well, I pull into the lot and my vehicle has joined a cadre of but five others. And it's dark. Without guilt I park too far forward and too far to my right, essentially wiping out three parking places.
So I scurry up to the box office and get my ticket. It's dark out. I suppose now I won't have much trouble gettng in. ( Here's one positive in the day. The ticket guy gives me a scowl when I ask for the senior rate.)
I need to veer off here to give my non-media friends a little background. One of the benefits of working in the media is you often get free tickets to movies. The movie people are wanting the media people talking about and promoting their creations. Sometimes the tickets you get are for special premiers with packed houses. Sometimes you get invited to little private preview showings. ("That's so you can lord it over your readers and viewers by essentially saying, "nyeh, nyeh, nyeh, nyeh, nyeh, nyeh. I saw it before you did.) Well private just means you and about 50 other Roper and Eberts are in the house. My point is it's not just you and Randolph Hearst taking in a flick after a swim in the Gold Leaf Pool at the castle. I now know what a truly PRIVATE showing means.
Okay, I'm a little early for my showing. I want to make sure I get a seat. With the pressure seemingly off, I slowly amble to theatre number 7 of 12. I can hear music as I'm walking in (InTheDark) but nothing is up on the screen yet. Well, lo and behold, I'm the only one in the theatre at this juncture. No doubt there will be a rush just before the movie starts. I take the next ten minutes and close my eyes to just kind of reflect on the strange day I've had up to this point. I open my eyes when the promotional annoncements start showing up on the screen. I stand up and do a slow 360 , and ams a bit surprised I am still alone. Well surely someone will arrive before the previews.
Nope! The previews start and I'm still alone. (And It's Dark) These are all Disney trailers and I think they will never end. Will this theatre ever fill up? Phew! Just as the "Feature" reference comes up, I hear some giggling. I see three noisy little girls, I'd say 9 or 10 years old, turn into the theater and head up the arena stairs towards me. I'm thinking there must be others right behind them? No!
Oddly, in a fairly large theatre by today's standards, they choose to sit right behind me, two rows back. I'm prepared to have them ruin the whole movie for me. (And It's Dark.) But once the movie gets started, they are quiet as mice. (Looking back, they may have been mice.)
So here I am getting a true private showing even though I have to pay the senior rate to get in.
QUICK MOVIE REVIEW. Interesting animation. Story Line? Chicken Little does Roswell, and has a strange, violent encounter with the three Wizards of of Oz. Mama Wizard, Papa Wizard and Baby Wizard. Look out they all have three eyes and can turn into laser zapping robots whenever they want. (And Its Dark) Bring notebook for jotting down cliches. The movie packs in a least of a hundred of them, including most of the music. Enough review. There is not a lot here I should refer to in class.
About mid movie I hear what I think is a male voice behind me. I do a 180 and I can't match a voice with a person or an apparition. (And It's Dark.) I do see the girls. They're there and that gives me some comfort.
A couple of corny scenes later and the girls have tiptoed down the stairs heading for the lobby. It's late enough in the movie I doubt they'll return. I'm all alone, I think. (And It's Dark) I catch the happy father and son resolution of the movie (remind you of Nemo?) and start taking in the credits. (And It's Dark) Then it happens. The giggling has returned. Somehow these girls had teleported themselves back into their seats behind me. Please tell me there are Deus Ex Machina contraptions in this theatre? Maybe just some secret tunnel contrived by teens as this generations way of getting in free? The girls reappearance is eerie enough in itself, but a middle aged male, who seems to be a parent, has joined them. (I'm pretty sure of this because it is no longer totally dark!)
Just let me say it, "OOOOOHHHHH."
I get my fill of the credits when they start listing the "lighting techs" and "best boys." I stand up to leave. I do another 360. They're gone. How do they do that? I almost wish its still dark?
One of the benefits of spending your adult life as a journalist is when you have a question, you ask it. So I stopped by the ticket counter on my way out.
"How many seats does theatre 7 house?"
"417. Why do you ask?"
"Well how many tickets did you sell for that showing of "Chicken Little?"
"Just yours. Why?"
"Just curious. Thanks."
And then it was Dark Again.
I'm sure you could care less what I think Michael Eisner. But what I think, is you may have gotten out just in time.
You know what? I just realized it's Thursday night. Does that change anything?
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