Victory At Last

I hurt when I see people sell themselves short. That's because I've been there, and I know how tough it is to pull yourself out of that pit without a hand. It takes one to know one, and while its painful to watch, as a teacher its the most satisfying thing in the World to reach down with that helping hand and have somebody take it. That's my attention getter to introducing you to Laura and Gabrielle. (Laura! I told you this was coming) I doubt they know each other, but I'll tell you right now they are soul mates.

I know enough about both of them to tell you they've had some traumas in their young lives. None of us need to know the details. What you do need to know is that somewhere in coping with those stresses someone or something ate in to their self-worth. To look at them it would make no sense to you. They are both petite, very attractive, nice voices, penetrating eyes and at first glance full of confidence. When they employ them, their smiles are crushing. And yet some force beyond them told them they were not worthy of attention, that they should never speak in public. That's when you hate teaching a required speech class.

 Let's start with Laura. She came to me during class to tell me she had tried this before and failed and it was happening again. She was going to drop the course. She just couldn't do it. I've learned from two stints at teaching that somebody who wants to drop your class seldom bothers to pop by and tell you about it. Laura was looking for answers. Instinct kicked in and I did something I'd never done before. I looked her in the eye and said, "Laura let's take a walk."

I left the rest of the class to fend for itself and Laura and I hit the hallway. I grabbed her hand and squeezed. Instead of asking her to reveal her pain I talked about mine. There was a time I used to throw up before having to get in front of anybody. The more I shared my pain the more I could feel her tension subside. The more I talked about overcoming and using that fear, the more she relaxed. I didn't know how all this was going to end, but it was a big moment in my life that she decided not to quit.

Gabrielle had moved West a number of years ago leaving her touchstone extended family behind in New Jersey. If you'd seen her quick wit, her good grades, her outward interest in politics, her easy way with people in one on one conversations you'd never guess there was a problem. But as we approached the time to start that first public speech panic arrived. Like Laura, Gabrielle told me she thought she was going to have to drop the class. In a previous attempt someone made her feel like she was no good. I don't know that person. But I don't like that person. Why? Don't we want people to succeed?  Well I got to talk about throwing up again. I eased some concerns. And thank you Gabrielle for sticking around.

So what happened?

Laura still struggled with that first speech and I let her give it from her seat. Gabrielle did her first one sitting and I sat beside her for support.

Second speech Laura stands up and gives her speech from her seat. She started showing some real command of the situation. She said the fear was still there, but it wasn't showing. Gabrielle stands up and gives her speech in front of the class while I'm sitting close by.

Now we pause for a little drama. After class one day Laura stops by with an invitation to watch her in a class project for another class. Wow! These things don't often happen this fast. It was a play she had participated in writing and where she was playing the lead. And she was good.

Meantime Gabrielle comes to talk to me about her final speech where she needs to persuade people to take action. And then she would need to handle a 15 minute discussioin with the class on that issue. I'm thinking to myself maybe I can guide her into something semi-controversial, but then I looked at the dertermination in her eyes. " I want to do it on sexually transmitted diseases and the need to not rely on abstinence in seeking solutions to the problem."

Okay, let's do it.

They weren't just good in those final speeches, they were great. They were powerful. They had control of their audiences. You could see the glow in their soul. Singular soul, because though the time was a year apart, though one's a blond, and one a brunette,they are soul mates. And I'm glad they let me visit.

You were wondering why anyone would want to teach? Hmm.