Thursday, May 26, 2005

Here's How I See It!

It's a good thing we took a break. We are in the middle of selling our rental property, and I'm getting ready to start summer classes the day after Memorial Day. The few of you who've had to deal with similar issues competing for your attention will share a modicum of sympathy. The rest of you I know are saying, "Quit Whining!"  Let me get some of the details out on the table and then I'll quit whining.

I got home late last night to hear a message from campus saying, "if you really want to teach five classes, but get paid for two, the Dean says go ahead."

Honest, it is okay with me because of some complicated circumstances some graduating students are facing. But they offered and I accepted an offer to drop one of the five courses to protect my sanity. Then, thinking I knew which classes were left, I promptly e-mailed the students in another class telling them they could breath easier because their class had re-surfaced. All three of them face an additional sememster if they can't get this class in.

So, anyway, how would you like to be on the other end of my relief email and seconds later you get an email from the department telling you that course had been dropped for good from the schedule. You'd be bored silly should  I go through the process telling you how I temporarily resolved that issue, so let's leave it here.

So in the middle of this my realtor calls. Before going any further you should know we love our realtor. She's been kind, responsive, hard working and got us a contract six weeks out from putting our town home on the market. And got a contract at a price we could live with. Okay that's out of the way.

Why did she call? She called  to tell us they've finished the inspection on the townhome, and found two minor plumbing leaks underneath two sinks. This comes two days after we paid our independent contractor to put in new drain stopper systems in those sinks. Mightened he have noticed?

Well, we have to agree to get that fixed right away or something that simple could kill the deal. We can either drive 30 miles to sign an agreement or she, the realtor, can fax it to our home.  ( I have no idea how to activate the fax system) We would then fax an agreement that we'd fix the leaks back to her so she can let the buyer's agent know it's still a go. Or we could ,if we want, argue about it. Not worth a fight.

Not wanting to drive 30 miles to get the document, drive another 20  miles to get Peggy's signature, and then another 20 back to the realtor, I get the fax number at the local UPS store for our realtor to fax the document.

I pause here to call one of the three students whose academic skins I hope I've saved, to let her know what she must do. I email the same information to the other two.  While they are responding, another phone call comes along. It's the realtor.

The title company wants me to call my mortgage holder to get a payoff statement so the title company can start doing the paper work in time for a closing set two weeks away.  My mortgage holder strangely has a policy of taking a week to get that statement out if the request comes from a title company or realtor. If I call they will turn right around and send it out almost immediately. 

"Can you call them and ask them to prorate the payoff to a week after the set closing date in case it doesn't close on the original date?"

I make the call.

The conversation is going along and I make the required request.

"Well we could do that sir, but your's is an FHA loan and we can't do any prorating past the first of any month."

So I say, " Since I don't know squat about this, can I just have you talk with my realtor so she can interpret for me."

"I'm sorry sir we can only talk to your realtor if you are on the line at the same time. Do you have conference call capacity there at home?"

"No!"

"Well I'll leave a note here that says you'll be calling back when you figure out what to. " That's not quite verbatim, but damn close.

So I call my realtor, and she says she'll have to call the title company to find out what it wants to do.

So I grab my cell phone and head down to the UPS office to get that original fax on the inspection. 

"Do you have a fax for Reinertson."

"Let me look. Hmm, doesn't look like it."

Well since I'm out I decide to go by my optomitrist's office to see if I could get a new glasses case. The one I had literally disintegrated following one minor mishap. Well, they had some of those on order. They would be there in about three weeks.

 Problem is, in case you're thinking I'm being too picky, is I've got a sunglasses attachment that also needs to fit inside the case.

"Wait, I might have something that will work for you."

She disappears, comes back in about five minutes with this sheepish grin on her face. She reveals this bright blue and red metal case with a large embossed printed logo that says, "Kids."

"I'll take it."

So I go back by the UPS office. Surely the inspection report would be there by now. 

"Sorry."

So I get in the car call my realtor on my cell, and she says, "I sent it over an hour ago, and I have a confirmation they received it!"

"And you put my name on it?"

"Yeah, Paul and Peggy. By the way the title company says just have the buyout dated a month and two weeks away."

"Okay and do I have to set up a conference call to get this all done?

"I don't know. Let me know what they say."

Back into the store. "Got anything for Paul and Peggy."

"Well, yeah. That's been here all morning. Here it is?"

"How much?"

"Two Dollars."

"Good. Here's my credit card."

So I get home, call the mortgate holder, and this time they send me to an outsourced operator from what sounded like Mongolia. I know that because she had me spell everything, not just my name. The out sourced operators from India know some English. She thankfully sends me to some one who speaks Texan, which I'm almost fluent in, who takes care of my request in about 30 seconds. Then I warily ask, "Can you fax that to my realtor, and how long will it take?" 

 I'm prepared for the worst.

"Yeah, no problem. She'll have it tommorrow morning. What's the number?"

"Huh?"  These are the same people who wanted a conference call just to say, "hi!"

If you're looking for me there's a chance I might be gone another 36 hours and I'm pretty sure I'll be out of cell phone range. I sure like my new glasses case.

I'm done whining! (for now)

POSTSCRIPT: If you've got some time look up the lyrics to "Doctor My Eyes" and tell me they don't fit.

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