MEANIE!

 

Flirtatious: "I know where you can win five bucks?"

Real Mood: Plum Tuckered Out

Prediction: I still think someone is going to go along with this.

 

Let's start with a little housekeeping.

For those of you who've been tuning in lately? Duane is crawling underneath the deck he built over the bricks where we were keeping score of our Ping Pong wins and lossses? Since I jogged his long term memory? He thinks it's important to find out who was ahead in 1968.  

My sister Theda thinks I'm being mean to you, and says it was "guy's" like me who forced her to drop out of school. That, of course, is nonsense. She's been going to school all her life. And she takes only the classes she wants to take. Don't we all envy her?

Sheila, my Yonker's soul echo, is joining the throngs who've found it necessary to correct my math over the years. Yesterday I said it was five days to go to the FIRST ANNIVERSARY? Well, I of course, was counting Friday.  So sighlemaccaba gently wrote this morning, " just three more days to go?"

But shouldn't the backtiming depend on what time I post on Friday? Oh, well, let's go with Yonkers.  Three more days!

Sheila, by the way, is going to sit back and be amused on Friday.  She has decided to send in her 29.95 for the CLIFF notes, rather than play, "Write This Story."

Okay, let's get back to the story. You now have some basic information to work with. (Remember the story can change anyway you want it to based on what you've got available.  It's just that you have to have the pictures and sound to make it work.)

I'm giving you yet more pictures, onomatopoeia, and captions to play with. 

I've been preaching the Art of Unwriting a TV story. Use few words. Plenty of words just get in the way.  So, one of my students, Lennon,  took a stab at building a story on Monday?

I have his permission to edit his efforts hoping to illustrate some points.  

Using the pictures available Monday, here's Lennon's story:

[PICTURE OF ROOSTER IN PEN]

[NAT SOUND AND CAPTION]

"Cock-a-Doodle Doo! That ought to wake up the planet."

LENNON WRITES: Denver's most popular piece of poultry is missing in action. Neighbors were surprised in what they DID NOT hear yesterday morning. As dawn set, Rufus, an award winning rooster did not crow. (what picturesare you going to use to cover all these words?)

[PICTURE OF STUDENT JUSTIN IN NEW YORK CITY HAT]

[CAPTION]

"I never had rooster before. I wonder is it tastes like chicken?

LENNON WRITES: Neighbors notified authorities immediately. (We don't have any pictures of neighbors, do we?) A small girl seems to be the only witness.

[PICTURE OF GIRL POINTING]

 [CAPTION]

"The rapper looking guy with the NEW YORK CITY hat on? He went that way. I think he's hiding behind the Starbucks."

LENNON WRITES: She said she saw a "hip hop looking rapper guy" ride in on a steer just before dawn.

[PICTURE OF STEER]

[CAPTION:]

"I wouldn't want to steer you in the wrong direction."

LENNON  WRITES: She hopped on her power wheel and followed the bandit as far as she could before her battery ran low, forcing her to return home. ( Tightened up, that's fun copy, but this is TV. We don't have any pictures of a power wheel, or of her skipping home.)

LENNON WRITES: She told authorities that she saw his steer duck behind the alley at the starbucks. ( Now in a bind we could re-use shots of the steer and the girl, but that copy really needs new shots of the witness and a couple of shots of Starbucks.)

(You have to know what video is available, what nat sound you've got, what soundbites you have before you write the story.)

Okay, now lets see if I can turn this into something close to TV.

[PICTURE OF ROOSTER]

[CAPTION OR SOUNDBITE WHILE ROOSTER PIC IS STILL SHOWING]

"Cock-a-Doodle Doo. That ought to wake the planet up"

PAUL WRITES: Rufus woke one man up

[PICTURE OF JUSTIN IN NYC HAT]

[CAPTION WHILE PICTURE OF JUSTIN IS UP.]

"I never had rooster before. I wonder if it tastes like chicken."

[WHILE JUSTIN'S PICTURE IS STILL UP]

PAUL WRITES: The man is out of control. The fowl is on the run.

[PICTURE OF GRASSHOPPER]

[NAT SOUND AND CAPTION]

"Chirp, Chirp. Don't step on me."

PAUL WRITES: Witness to a man in fowl pursuit.

[PICTURE OF GIRL POINTING]

[CAPTION]

" The rapper looking guy with the new york hat on? He went that way. I think he's hiding behind the Starbucks."

[PICTURE OF STEER UP]

PAUL WRITES: the rooster fortunately has a booster.

[CAPTION]

"I wouldn't want to steer you in the wrong direction."

[PICTURE OF ROOSTER UP AGAIN]

PAUL WRITES: Rufus rules the roost once more.

[NAT SOUND]

"cock-a-doodle doo."

PAUL REINERTSON, BIRD BEAT.

So make sure you look at all the pictures, nat sound, and soundbites before you start piecing together your puzzle. Remember, unwrite. MORE PICTURES, SOUND AND CAPTIONS HAVE ARRIVED. DON'T FORGET THE INCENTIVE. FIVE DOLLARS TO THE BEST STUDENT STORY. FIVE DOLLARS TO THE BEST STORY AT LARGE.  FRIDAY IS THE BIG SPECIAL DAY. DON'T BE LEFT OUT.

i forgot how much work it is to unwrite...i'm glad i'm retired.