Behold A Squirrel!

We have two Austrian Pines in the backyard. We planted them when we moved in so we know they are at least 16 years old.  And now we know they must age at the same rate as homosapiens. That's because their adolescence is over.  They've attracted their first SQUIRREL! 

Whenever I ask advice at a nursery or bird store? They invariably answer my question with a question.

"Well how mature is your backyard?"

Well now I finally have the answer.

"Old enough to attract a squirrel, don't ya know?"

It's appropriate that a squirrel shows up on this day.  Why? Well this is the day, once a year, I go see my cardiologist.  It's no big deal. I almost always get a clean bill of health.  But I wonder now what the tests will reveal. 

You see I get there about 10 minutes early? That's because I can never remember which floor he's on.  So I get that figured out and I'm feeling pretty good.  I casually saunter up to the third floor and begin my amble down the hallway to door# 350.  Just to make sure I pull out my reading glasses. With the glasses balanced on my ears I push forward until I can focus on his name.

"Yep, the right place. And I'm still 2 minutes early."

I reach for the portal knob and turn it? Well, actually I only attempt to turn it.  It's locked.

"Hmmm! Must be stuck in traffic."

So I'm waiting, and waiting...and decide that maybe my appointment is at 10:30, not 10:00 a.m.?  So to kill time I go down and borrow a pen from the pharmacist? I'll do a crossword puzzle.

Oh, and then I stop by the little canteen and get some coffee to drive up my heart rate.

Back upstairs I crouch in the hallway in the semi-lotus position. I'm right in front of door number 350.  I don't want to miss the doctors arrival. We'll have a good laugh about the traffic jam he got caught in.

Well, 10:30 comes along, and nothing? Whoa, I hope he's okay. I'd hate to have to find a new "Ticker Tinkerer."

Well it's 10:35 and time for action.  I call my primary care "doc" in the same building to see if I can get a phone number.  

Five minutes on hold....and I'm thinking this hearts going to be really cranking when he gets here.

Finally.

"Dr. Sherman's office. This is Charlotte."

"Charlotte, this is Paul. Is Doc okay? I have an appointment with him, and his door's locked."

"Where are you?"

"Outside your door at the Centennial office?"

"We only go there on Fridays. You know that."

"Do I need to come up to your other office then?"

"Let's see.  No.  Why don't you just show up right where you are on Friday, like you were supposed to.  You know, Friday, the 10th?"

"What time?"

"10 A.M."

"The 10th at 10. Hmm. Okay. See you then."   

I have no explanation except maybe that squirrel showing up for the first time. If you have a serious case of squirreliness? What specialty do they refer you to?

Nuts! Never mind.  I really don't want to know.