Google Pain

Caption: "Okay, now we'll need to check that prostate."

Self Googling

Chapter Two.

This posting may have come a lot sooner had I not been thrown a curve. So here's the deal. Two months ago I could have verified the tale I'm about to tell.  But as it turns out you are now going to have to take it on faith. That will become clear shortly.

So sometime in the past few years I posted some reflections on suffering PAIN at the hands of those who were monitoring my health. The gist of the posting was that as I grew in years? PAIN became an issue in the doctor's office. And so I grew in understanding that female care givers tend to have a far gentler approach to their professions. Call it sexism, reverse sexism, whatever you like. IT IS TRUE.

So about two months ago I'm having my annual physical and my lovely physician friend says, "DID YOU WRITE A BLOG ABOUT ME."

I reply humbly, "yeeeaah. Why do you ask?"

Well, turns out she had some time in the office to do a little self GOOGLING and finds her name attached to PaulsModestMusings.

"Did I put your name in there"

"Yes you did!"

So I raced home and GOOGLED to discover I had, in fact, put her name in the posting, along with the names of my female dentist and my female optician.  So I GOOGLED all their names seperately? And sure enough they each have a listing associated with PAIN and PaulsModestMusings. But here is the topper. If you were in PAIN? And you were hoping somebody on the internet might be able to help? Guess whose name pops up.  Yeah, me. Good luck to you. Take two aspirin and call me in the morning.

Well fearing my physicians might resent the association with me in this context, I took out their last names. That was about three weeks ago.  Well I can report today that according to Google I am no longer a PAIN DOCTOR.  And the three care giving ladies return to their anonymity as far as PAIN is concerned. It made me feel that at least SOMEBODY at Google is paying attention.

"But wait! There's more!"

I may have been stripped of my pain credential, but I now have a new expertise. Those very close to me know of my ranting about traffic circles, especially that death trap along Pacific Coast Highway in Long Beach, California.  

TRAFFIC CIRCLES, in my mind, are the most insane traffic flow design in human history.  But let's go beyond my attitude.

Since I've mentioned my traffic circle disdain in this forum a few times? Were you to GOOGLE my name today? You would discover I have become an expert on California Traffic Design. Well, then, California, here is  my expert opinion on Traffic Circles. GET RID OF THE DAMN THINGS! And Colorado quit adding them to every new development that comes along.  

"Calm down Paul!"

Okay! Before I go? Wait, I've got a kicker.

Should you Google my name today? What will you see up there? Yesterday's posting. This sure is fun. Most of the time.  Let's see if they pick this one up.

Oh, in case you didn't think you'd want to read CHAPTER THREE? I should let you know it's about SEX!